Three Things 9-5 Working Mamas Need to Know
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If you’re a 9-5 working mama, I’m sure you know what it’s like to feel totally exhausted, drained, and defeated at the end of the work week. Whether it’s the rigid hours of the workday and never ending to do lists, overthinking & responding to passive aggressive emails, sitting in a dark stale office, the 5pm rush hour commute home, or coming home and scrounging together every last ounce you have left to be a mom, wife, daughter, friend, or anything else you’re called… you know what I mean when I say working 9-5 as a mom can leave you feeling totally depleted.
But, did you know the reason you feel burnt out, depleted, and like you’re running on fumes is because, well… you probably are…? It’s true. Your body doesn’t just feel like it’s given the week everything it’s got…it actually has…. and it’s probably depleted it’s resources & resorted to running on stress hormones, which after some time can cause major issues for your health & wellbeing. (You can read more about How to Eliminate Stress While Working Your 9-5 here.) From this post you’ll learn why the 9-5 can be so detrimental for moms & how to know if you’ve been running on stress hormones. To better understand all this, there are 3 important things you need to know. Let’s jump right into it.
1. Your body was designed to keep you alive, & it will do so at any cost.
When the human body perceives danger, it automatically enters fight or flight and prepares to either escape the situation or fight off the threat. When your body senses trouble, it starts pumping out stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline to help you survive the situation and starts sending ALL of it’s energy & resources directly to the parts of your body that are needed to handle the situation at hand. Because of this, your body stops sending resources to its other systems & parts that aren’t crucial in that moment to survive.
For example, if you’re being chased by a bear, your body is going to start pumping out the stress hormones & equipping you with your best chance of getting away to safety. Understandably, it isn’t worried about fueling other systems of your body in that moment, like say your immune or digestive systems. The body’s ability to automatically start working to keep us alive in dangerous situations is truly incredible, especially in situations of life or death.
However, there’s one small problem with this. Our bodies have a difficult time differentiating between a seriously dangerous threat vs something slightly inconvenient, like getting stuck in traffic during the morning commute or running late for a meeting. So, whether your life is literally on the line, or you just received an email from your boss on a Friday afternoon ordering you to attend an unexpected meeting on Monday morning, your body thinks you’re in danger & the stress response starts, which causes the other systems of your body to essentially be neglected for the time being.
Now, typically this all happens super fast & once the body realizes it’s safe, the stress response calms & the body returns to a state of rest, so it’s no big deal. But, what happens when we are consistently exposing ourselves to environments, relationships, or any other situations in which our bodies feel threatened, stressed, or in harms way (like, let’s say, a toxic 9-5?) We don’t give ourselves a chance to return to that state of rest and safety, ultimately leading our bodies to get stuck in a cycle of just trying to survive. Eventually, our bodies use up all their resources (which ALSO causes us to be less able to handle stress, so eventually, we even become stressed over being stressed) and our bodies are pumping out stress hormones daily, just to get us through, day after day, which eventually leads to some pretty serious issues.
Think about it: How many parts of your 9-5 stress you out each day? I remember working in a 9-5 so toxic just the piercing sound of my alarm clock in the morning would immediately set off my body’s stress response, just thinking about what was to come throughout the day. Now, add in all the (beautiful) stressful things that come along with being a mom. Whether you’re in the early newborn days, you’re running on little to no sleep, you just returned from maternity leave & leaving your baby with someone else has you in a constant panic, or you’re dealing with the daily mom tasks like managing meals, schedules, sports, playdates, activities, etc… it’s very likely you’ve been caught in the cycle of running on stress hormones.
Here are some ways your body may be trying to tell you you’re running on stress hormones & that it needs some support:
You’re easily triggered or unable to manage complicated or difficult situations’
You have a hard time falling asleep or staying asleep
You’re frequently exhausted, unmotivated, or feel stuck
Your overall outlook on life is negative, maybe you’re always assuming the worst-case scenario will occur or you’re constantly feeling worried or anxious
Hair loss, skin problems, or “unexplainable” GI issues
Irritability or low tolerance for most things
You feel like a failure when you’re not being productive or you’re addicted to the “grind”
It’s hard for you to feel content, relaxed, or at peace
You get sick often
Low sex drive or fertility issues
Your blood sugar raises and drops drastically throughout the day (hangry)
Your body temperature is low/you’re always cold
You miss your period or experience painful periods or PMS
If these are you, don’t worry, there’s good news. Now that you’re aware of the signs you may be running on stress hormones, there are SO many easy ways you can eliminate stress and get your body back into a calm & thriving state. (I have a whole post on it, you can read it here.) Also, I want you to know you’re not alone… most 9-5 working moms (and women in general) are in the exact same place as you. Which brings me to my next point…
2. The traditional 9-5 workday was never intended for women and holds no regard for our unique needs.
Did you know the traditional 9-5 workday was created around men's hormone cycles, & has no regard for women or moms at all? It’s true. Men’s hormone cycles are the same each day, having them ready for a 9am start and a 5pm finish, ready to do it all again the same way the next day. However, for women, every single day of our monthly hormone cycle is different, and our bodies need us to provide them with varying levels of rest, support, foods, and movements depending on the day of the month. Our cycles also cause us to be better or worse at certain things like completing tasks, socialization, prioritizing, organizing, finishing assignments, pitching new ideas, etc. all depending on what day of the month it is. (If this is a brand new concept to you, you definitely want to check out Alissa Vitti’s books In The Flo and Woman Code.)
So… as you can probably imagine, the 9-5 “grind”, or overworking for a job that doesn’t understand this or have much flexibility is going to force us to live unaligned with our body’s needs, which in itself puts a ton of stress on us.
(If you’re interested in ditching the 9-5 & transitioning into staying home with your babies full time, or if you want to create an additional stream of income for your family, I have something for you. I created a FREE mini guide that teaches moms like you how to start a work from home blogging businesses that makes you money while you sleep!)
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After enough time running on stress hormones and living in survival mode, it’s common to lose sight of what our body actually needs, usually because we’re just too exhausted to think about it or even realize the cycle we’re stuck in isn’t normal. For most of us, we just go on day after day feeling awful and going through the motions. Then, every so often, we look for ways to feel better, or the next quick fix… which brings us to point number 3.
3. Most of the self care & wellness advice & products you’re being sold are actually making you feel worse.
Most people, men & women alike, don’t actually know why they constantly feel bad, so most of the things we try doing to feel better just ends up slapping a bandaid over our real problems, which unfortunately, usually makes the problems much worse. Here are 2 things worth noting:
First- most of the current feel better fixes or self “care” rituals being promoted by society actually put more stress on the body (I’m certainly looking at you cold plunges & skincare routines filled with tons of toxic products.) Please do yourself a favor and look into nervous system regulation, low-tox product swaps, and metabolically support living if you’re looking to seriously start feeling better. Know that eating enough, getting sunlight daily, surrounding yourself with better people, swapping household items for cleaner alternatives, and quitting jobs you hate are going to help thousands of times more than a bubble bath with a glass of wine while scrolling aimlessly.
Second- Most people truly don’t know the environments they’re spending time in & their lifestyle choices largely impact stress levels, so if this is all new to you, don’t panic… I’ve been where you are. As a good place to start, my Successful Startup Mini Guide teaches moms how to start work from home businesses so you can focus more on the things that really matter and money rolls in passively while you sleep. And don’t forget, if you’re looking to start living better but still working your 9-5, read my post How to Eliminate Stress While Working Your 9-5.
Phew! I don’t know about you but I’m tired just writing about this. Mamas… if it’s not clearly spelled out for you by now, let me keep it simple: There are more things working against working moms than for them, and unless you have an amazing and flexible employer, it’s likely you’re having to keep slapping bandaids over the real issues to make it through the day (which are likely making the problems worse.) I hope this was helpful in understanding how & why the 9-5 can be really detrimental for moms & how to know if your body is asking you for support. As always, take good care of yourself & remember mama, you’re already doing the hardest job in the world, you can do anything.
I help moms make their stay at home motherhood dreams a reality by starting work from home blogging businesses that make them money while they sleep.
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